Laughs from the road


Trips to work are (hopefully) pretty uneventful things.  There can be whole stretches I don’t remember driving as the mind slips into autopilot.  But these last few days the road has given me a few good laughs and I’d like to share.  It makes me wish I had a car mounted camera that I could just flick a switch and grab these moments as images and not just as reminiscences.

Starting with this morning as I was heading down the hill coasting towards work, a bus was chugging up the hill.  It wasn’t a regular bus for the area and as it was empty I guessed it was on charter.  Or was it?  The bus itself wasn’t   to sure where it was going, the rolling sign at the front of the bus that would read what route it was on or that it was ‘On Charter’ or ‘Out of Service’ this morning read ‘UNCERTAIN’.  Maybe someone should give the driver a street directory.

Yesterday morning I was waiting at lights again not far from work.  Across the road a cyclist tried to run the red and nearly got himself taken out by traffic.  I have to mention here, that was not the funny thing, just the thing that drew my attention to him.  I noticed he had a bike with a tiny built-in motor.  This is also not funny but practical as the area surrounding work is hilly and we’re not all triathlon enthusiasts.  Funny came when he took off and it sounded like not like a leaf blower (which is the sort of motor those bikes are usually fitted with) but more like a small motorbike.  Then I noticed the dodgy built exhaust extension he’d made for his cycle which took the high-pitched whine of the motor and gave it a throatier burble.  I wondered if he’d just taken the spokey-dokes off his kid brother’s bike for the trip up the street.  Really, this guy was a double fool and deserving of my laughter.

Then Friday I took a rare bus trip to see a friend as my car was in for service.  I enjoyed the trip out in the morning and was unsure what the trip back at 3pm would be like.  But any concerns I may have had were quickly relieved by the school kids I shared the bus with.  They were noisy, and there were lots of them, but they kept to their seats and even got out of seats for adults without being asked.  The bus driver though must have been distracted by their noise as he turned left instead of right onto a main road.  Roars came up from not just the kids at the back, but they were pretty vocal.

“He’s taking us back to school!”
“It’s Friday man, we don’t want to go back to school!”

To rectify his error he tried a U-turn at the next round-about.  Unfortunately it was one of those teeny ones that council’s put in to appease some complaining voter.  That is totally ineffectual, especially if you have a full size bus full of school children in peak hour trying to spin its huge bulk around it.  He didn’t make it and had to do a three point turn.  Cars were banked up in both directions and all I could do was sit there my head in my hands grinning stupidly. 

Say, that driver really could have done with the sign from this morning!

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