We voted today and the thing you can guarantee every election is that you will be in a line sometime in the day. My sister and I did pretty well, only standing in line for about 40 minutes, this still leaves plenty of time for idle thinking.
We lamented the lack of competition for our electorate. Being a steady Labor seat many of the major parties don’t waste their time or money contesting and if they do, they send the young and ambitious but inexperienced who are trying to gain a few brownie points with their superiors in the party. It was with this in mind and with time to contemplate such things that we came up with a new party.
The Left Liberals
Standing for the rights to the right of all left-handed people.
1. Subsidise all left-handed equipment
2. Research grants for the development of the left-handed screwdriver
2. Push for the change of standard writing direction from’ left to right’ to ‘right to left’
3. Support the right to own a non-smudge pen
4. Create a Left handed public holiday. Braces for the right-handed will be on sale with proceeds going to a left-handed charity
5. Celebrate the greatest of the left-handed and induct a famous Australian into our South-Paw Hall of Fame
Ambassador: Alan Border, left-handed batman, left-handed orthodox spin bowler.